So it’s the last day of November, the Christmas season is upon us again. I’m amazed how differently I feel from last year, when I was elevated and didn’t realize it, and wouldn’t be right again until April. How grateful I am for my sanity, my stability! Yes, I have to put up with the side effects from my mood stabilizer and antipsychotic but some things are going right for me. I can read again. I can write coherently. I may be struggling more with the cooking but I’m still executing. I am still very fearful about a catastrophic future but if I stay in today like AA has taught me I do okay.
Right now I have a roof over my head, my finances are in order, I am in good health, I have an excellent treatment team, I have a loving husband and family that supports me. I’m involved in my AA community, I have many friends, everything is as it should be. Soon we will get our Christmas tree and I can decorate it, one of my favorite things to do. Everything is fine, I am safe, I keep telling myself that when the anxiety creeps in, as it does sometimes.
I didn’t ask for this bipolar disorder, didn’t expect it, but I think I’m doing a good job managing it. I’m sober, I take my meds religiously, I have an excellent sleep schedule, today my mood is normal. I may not be able to have a traditional job but I’m productive in my own way. I guess that’s all I can ask for, and today I’m content. So my status today is good. I’ll take it.
No comments:
Post a Comment