Had some flashbacks yesterday but they didn't really upset me as much, which is good. I'm making progress. One thing that popped into my head was that night back in 2003 (?) (my memory isn't so hot now because of the meds) that I was wondering around downtown in a quasi-manic state in the dead of night and saw all these big-sized river rats jumping in and out of an open dumpster in the garage under the Statehouse.
I thought it was gross and funny at the same time -- and also very telling in a tongue in cheek kind of way. I wrote a brief, witty letter to the editor at The Columbus Dispatch and lo and behold they printed it. I heard recently that they are having a rat problem in Worthington -- I wonder if all those river rats that infested the Scioto River flowing through downtown for so long have migrated? Heck, they have got to have gone somewhere.
That was a strange night for me. I also ran into a male prostitute who introduced himself as "Adam." I replied, "Hello, I'm Eve." It just sorta seemed like the natural, funny thing to say. He had very bad teeth and was very skinny. Not in good shape at all. We chatted for awhile and then he jumped into a car that drove up. Off into the night he went.
I kept wandering around and for some reason, started picking up trash under some bushes along the perimeter of the Statehouse. A cheap Vodka bottle, empty bags of chips, cigarette butts, all kinds of discarded things. I put it all into a trashcan. I had this overwhelming urge to clean things up, and this has been a re-occurring theme in my manias. Like my dogs, for example. I saw them as angels that had to be kept clean at all times.
Seeing as we're on the subject of cleanliness and rats today, we've had two run-ins with rats at my household. There was that time my dear, beloved Basset Big Lou tried to bring a dead, frozen rat into the house -- probably to hide it away and eat it later. Michael stopped him at the door, somehow got the rat out of his mouth, and threw it into the street.
Then we once had a rat actually in our house. Now I didn't see it but my husband did. That rodent got in here somehow and got himself into the basement. My husband told me much later that he heard something making a noise down there and opened the door to the basement and there was the rat -- halfway up the stairs, just looking at him defiantly. I'm not sure how he responded. I'll have to ask him. That would be very telling.
There's not too much in our basement right now, given a constant, reoccurring sewage line problem. I do keep the leftover pieces of my manic artwork down there and I think some mold is forming on them. That reminds me: I wonder what happened to that artwork of mine that I threw away in my trashcan during one of my manias? Who has it? That was quite a bit of stuff -- some of my best pieces. Where did it go?
Come to think of it, lots of things have "gone missing" from my house. I'll have to sit down and make a list. I can't find some of my journals, for instance. I planted a rosary in my tire planter one year and that's gone. Michael would never throw something like that out. I liked that rosary because a beautiful yellow flower soon grew in the tire. I always thought it was a special message. Now nothing grows in that tire. I planted bee balm last year and it doesn't look like it's coming back. I'm going to try again this year.
Pleased to report I'm feeling good today. Really stable which is so relieving. Almost calm. I like it. Onward with my day I go.
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